Quotes

“I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hate so stubbornly is because they sense once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.”
James Baldwin.

“Hate is a strategy. Its what some psychologists call a secondary emotion, the thing that shows up when the real feeling is just to heavy to hold. “

“Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”
– Buddha

“Pay attention to what people say in anger. They have been dying to tell you that.”

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“They are not lazy, they’re lost. Lazy is a symptom, the source of the laziness is they’re lost. I’ll put it in another way. The person who’s presented as lazy, the young man, maybe your husband. They’re not lazy they’re lost. If you look at the science behind why we procrastinate, a large portion of procrastination is depression. And i cant think of a more debilitating emotional state than feeling lost.”

“What if you don’t crush Tuesday. What if you sit and watch tv all day and do nothing. Are you a failure, should you be depressed? Or maybe watching tv all day and being a vegetable is crushing Tuesday. That is the problem with words like crushing Tuesday, it doubles down on achievement.”

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” “

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Enjoying the passage of time

– Jimmy Carr

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When you understand that every opinion is a vision loaded with personal history, you will begin to understand that all judgment is confession.
– Nikola Tesla

“Your wounds will heal, but not if you keep opening them to prove they still hurt.”

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
– Carl Jung

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“Always always talk good about yourself. Always talk positive about yourself. Always tell yourself you can do it. Always be that encourager. And i was like “but that doesn’t make sense. You know, you know you’re messing up”. The breakthrough was that i have a picture of myself at 6 year old. And i looked at that picture of that kid. And i said, is that kid a bad kid? No, he’s 6. At no time in your life did you ever stop being that little boy. Ever. That little boy is you. It changed the way i saw everything. And i said, would i ever call him an idiot, would i ever call that boy stupid or ugly? Never.”

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“The world is not driven by greed, its driven by envy. The fact that everybody’s five times better of than they used to be, they take it for granted, all they think about is somebody else is having more now and its not fair that he should have it and they don’t.”
Charles Munger

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“We chase things, not because they’re great, but because we feel empty without them. Next time, ask yourself: Do i really want this, or am i just desperate for something? Hunger can make even the worst meals taste great.”

“Almost everything we think we know about addiciton is wrong. You get a rat and you put it in a cage and you give it two water bottles. One is just water, and the other is water laced with either heroine or cocaine. If you do that the rat will almost always prefer the drug water and almost always kill itself quite quickly. In the 70’s professor Alexander comes along and he looks at this experiment, and he notice something. He said ‘ah, we’re putting the rat in an empty cage. It’s got nothing to do except use these drugs. Lets try something a bit different.’ So professor alexander build a cage that he called rat park. They got loads of cheese, they got loads of coloured balls. They got loads of tunnels, and crucially they got loads of friends. But heres the fascinating thing. In rat park, they don’t like the drug water. You go from almost 100% overdose when they’re isolated to 0% overdose when they have happy and connected lives. What if addiction isn’t about your chemical hooks? What if addiction is about your cage? What if addiction is an adaptation to your environment? Maybe we shouldnt even call it addiction. Maybe we should call it bonding. Human beings have natural and innate need to bond. And when we are happy and healthy we’ll bond and connect with each other. But if you cant do that, because you are isolated, or traumatised or beaten down by life, you will bond with something that will give you some sense of relief. Now that might be gambling, that might be pornography, that might be cocaine. That might be cannabis. But you will bond or connect with something because that is our nature. The opposite of addiction is not sobriety, the opposite of addiction is human connections and connections to your passions.”

Whats your problem? “Im an alcoholic and a meth addict”. “No thats how you have been treating your problem”

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“An unexamined life is not worth living”
– Socrates

“How can a person navigate the world if they are lost within themselves?”
– Socrates

“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserves your love and affection”
– Buddha

“You deserve all the love you give to everybody else”

“Those who know others are intelligent;
those who know themselves are truly wise.”
– Lao Tzu

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Don’t impose your own notion of someones destiny upon them

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If the why is strong, the how is easy

Those who have a why can bare any how

“The world will ask you who you are, and if you dont know, the world will tell you.”
Carl Gustav Jung

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate”
Carl Gustav Jung

“When you think, maybe this is just who i am. Remember that you don’t have to wear the chains just because they fit.”

“Even a brick wants to be something. It aspires.”
Louis Kahn

“Im always being visited by young men who says, ‘i’m practicing law and i don’t like it. I’d rather be a billionaire. How can i do it?’ And i tell them, well i’ll tell you a story. A young man goes to see Mozart and he says, Mozart i want to start composing symphonies, and Mozart said, how old are you? And the guy says 22, and he says you’re to young to do symphonies, and the guy says, yes, but you were 10 years old when you we’re composing symphonies. And Mozart says, yes, but i wasn’t running around asking other people how to do it.”

“Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell.”

“Thoughts come and go. Feelings come and go. Find out what it is that remains.”
– Raman Maharshi

“Wherever you go, go with all your heart.”
– Confucius

“Im not what happened to me, i am what i choose to become.”
– Carl Jung

“Theres a decently body of research saying that people can actually endure a significantly amount of pain for other people. So hear me out. If you got hooked up to an electric shock machine and they said, “Cool we’re just gonna turn this up and just tell us when to stop.” People stop. But if you tell them that their loved ones are in the other room, and that every shook that you take they don’t have to take. Peoples tolerance for pain goes up like tenfold. And to me i see that as an allegory for how we can choose to live our lives. That person who experiences that pain for their loved one, their wife, their spouse, their daughter, their son, do you think that in that moment when they feel like they’re keeping the storm from the people they love, that they dont feel like they have purpose? But objectively they’re suffering. See how theres layers to this? And so the idea is that saying following your passion is very self interested, it actually doesnt allow you to plug into a much stronger motivation or fuel. And so i would prefer follow your purpose. Its called they martyrdom effect, that basicly you can handle way more pain for other people than for yourself.”

“What a blessing it is to be tired in the pursuit of a challenge of your own choosing”

“What i didn’t know when i was in medical school, studying to become a physician, was how driven i was to prove my existence to the world. When you are driven to work too hard, you actually ignore what matters. And what matters if to spend time enjoying life, and the people around you. “
– Gabor Maté

“If the world appears to you only as thorn bearing obstacles. If you feel that everything is arrayed against you and there is no pathway forward. If you feel that you are surrounded by foes and obstacles instead of walking the golden pathway accompanied by allies with the world on your side. You might ask yourself, weather or not your aim is wrong. Because the world reveals itself in accordance with our aim.”

“If you are not naturally tired at night and excited in the morning, then you probably haven’t found something meaningful to work on. You are not stressed from doing to much, you are stressed of doing to little of what you care about.”

“When you look at most peoples goals, its a symptom. So always trace back anything that you can write down that you want for yourself, or you want for your life or family. Get back to, how do you make all of the things you want a byproduct. If you can do that you are figuring out that these are symptoms of something that you are not really conscious of. All of our goals will be byproducts of something larger.”

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Right is right even if no one is doing it. Wrong is wrong even if everyone is doing it.

“Christof Waltz who plays the main nazi in Inglorious Bastards. I think he won an Oscar for that role. He’s chillingly brilliant in this role. He’s relaxed, and he got a sense of humor. He doesn’t play this caricature of evil. Thats one of the reasons he’s so chilling. So he was one a talkshow after the movie came out, and the host asks him, ‘what did. you have to do as an actor to play evil so effectively?’. And he literally has this look of total confusion on his face. He doesn’t understand the question. He goes ‘What?’. And the host says again, ‘You were so good, what did you have to source yourself from to play evil? He was so scary’. And he looks at the host and goes, ‘He wasn’t evil.’. And this is why he was so good in his role. Because what he understood was that no-one thinks they’re evil. Everyone thinks they’re on the side of good. If you just remember that, that people think they’re on the side of good. They may be misdirected and all of those things are still true. But everybody thinks they’re on the side of good. If you just start with that basis when you interact. Where if you disagree or think someone is wrong, then seek to understand where they are sourcing that good from.”

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The cave you fear to enter, holds the treasure you seek

What you want is in the work that you are avoiding.

Where your fear is, there your task is.
– Carl Gustav Jung

What you avoid controls you. If you avoid tough conversations, your relationship suffer. If you avoid risk, your business will suffer. If you avoid failure, your growth will suffer. If you think having uncomfortable conversations is hard wait until you can see the result of not having uncomfortable conversations. Much harder. At least for me, i just try and face the thing that i’m avoiding, and constantly ask myself like what is that thing that im trying not to look at, and then force myself to stare at it. Because usually the thing that scares you the most, is the thing you need to face the most in order for you to move forward.
– Hormozi

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Better to be a warrior in a garden, than to be a gardner in a war.

– Sun-Tzu

Be skilled with a sword but keeps it sheathed.

–

No tree, it is said, can grow to heaven unless its roots reach down to hell.

– Carl Gustav Jung

Dont mistake kindness for weakness. The beast they tamed to be this kind is sleeping, its not dead.

A: “Saying men should be dangerous. By dangerous that implies that i should be ready to threaten someone. To hurt somebody.”
B: “No thats not what it means. It means you should be capable of it. But that doesn’t mean you should use it. There’s nothing to you otherwise. Like if you’re not a formidable force there’s no morality in your self control. If you’re incapable of violence. Not being violent isn’t a virtue. People who teach martial arts know this full well. If you learn a martial art you learn to be dangerous, but simultaneously you learn to control it. Both of those come together. And the combination of that capacity for danger and the capacity for control is what brings about the virtue. Otherwise you confuse weakness with moral virtue. I’m harmless, therefore i do no harm, therefore i’m good. Like no, that isn’t how it works. Its choosing not to do harm that makes you good. It takes great strength to be good.”

” ‘I’d never cheat on my wife’ it’s like, ‘is there anybody asking you to? That you actually find attractive or are there dozens of people asking you to that you find attractive’. Its like ‘I would never cheat’. No you just don’t have the opportunity. Now i’m not saying that everyones in that position. You know, that they would cheat if they got the opportunity, because thats not true. And its the same with regards to, “well i’m a peaceful man”, its like, no you’re not you’re just a weak coward. You wouldn’t dare to have a confrontation physical or metaphysical. And you’re passing it off as morality. Because you don’t want to come to terms with the fact of you’re own weakness and cowardice. And part of what Nietzsche was criticising was exactly of that sort. Said that; failure in life, masked by the morality that’s nothing but weak cowardice. Turns to the resentment that undermines and destroys everything, and that does that purposefully. Yeah i think he was criticising that under the facade of niceness, theres an ocean of resentment.”

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The first half of life is devoted to forming a healthy ego, the second half is devoted to letting go of it.

– Carl Gustav Jung

Learn all theories, master all techniques, but as you touch another human soul be just another human soul.

– Carl Gustav Jung

Dont mistake kindness for weakness. The beast they tamed to be this kind is sleeping, its not dead.

You dont need trophies on the wall, as they are always kept safe in your brain.

– David Goggins

Let your plans be dark and impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt

– Sun Tzu

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less.”
– C.S. Lewis

“The clear sign that you have a big ego is the degree to which you protect yourself. So the stronger the ego. The weaker the self. The more armor you wear the more fragile you actually are. So defensiveness, justification and the need to control how others see you are all signs that your ego run the show. The parradox is that the more you surrender your need to defend, the freer you become. “

“Control Ego when you are winning. Control thoughts when you are losing.”

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“Humanity often chases grandeur, yet profound joys can be found in simplicity.”

“Learning to be excited about simple things – a cup of coffee in the morning, seeing a friend, getting your favorite seat in the bus”

“Like if i wanted a dime when i was five years old, and it would make me happy, if i still had a dime then i should still be happy. But it doesn’t work that way. Does it? So we think that getting what i want makes us happy. When we get what we want we experience this blissful moment, when we got what we want, we don’t want anything else. And the joy that we experience, the release that we experience, the happiness, is not because we got what we wanted, but because we’re no longer wanting. We for a moment experience the great happiness of not wanting anything.”
Adyashanti

“Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants.”
– Epictetus

“Dont rely on happiness. Because happiness is difficult to maintain under suffering. Rely on adventure. Because adventure justify suffering. “

“There is 5 things you can do with money.
1) You can buy stuff
2) You can buy experiences
3) You can buy time
4) You can give it away
5) You can save it
Those are the exhaustive possibilities of what you can do with money. 2-5 gives happiness. Number 1 does not. 1 is what you biologically have an imperative to do. Is to go accumulate stuff. More of everything that shows that you are a successful person. However if you buy experiences and experience these things with people you love, you get happier. If you buy time and don’t fritter it away, that you use it for your own edification or for the relationships in your life, you get happier. If you give your money away to things you are very passionate about, you get happier. And if you save your money, you get way happier. Saving money is one of the ways you can buy happiness. Conversely, by the way, spending money that you don’t have , on consumption, running up your credit card to pay for your vacation, that is one of the best ways to get unhappier. Because you’re not making progress. You’re making regress. And all of human happiness comes from progress. Savings feels like progress.
“

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You become wiser by unlearning a false truth than by learning a new truth

If you want to offend a strong person, tell them a lie.
If you want to offend a weak person, tell them the truth.

Imagine truth as the most powerfull creature that nature could create. You dont need to defend it, set it free and it will defend itself.

Artists use lies to tell the truth

Most people when they want to say no and they don’t know how to say it, will try to become victimy and say i can’t because of this and this. I love this quote from Julius Caesar, Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar where his wife says, “don’t go to the senate, i had a horrible nightmare, you’re going to get stabbed.” So the guy comes to get him and he says, “Go tell the council, ‘Caesar will not come’. That i cannot is false. That i dare not falser still. No. Go tell them, ‘Caesar will not come’”.
And there have been really good studies, that examines getting out of depression. One study had one control group with therapy, one control group with meds, and a group that did nothing but eliminate the words “i can’t” and “i have to” from their responses. Instead they had to say “i choose not to”, “i choose to”, “i will”, “i wont”. The last group came out of their depression faster than any of the other groups. Every verbal thing we say that is not true hurts our bodies, hurts our psyches and leads us to anxiety and depression.
– Martha Beck

“A law in the physical universe is called constructive interference. And it says that when two wavelengths of equal length meet, the size of the frequency doubles. What this means is that you can get energy from conversation. You can get energy from the people around you. Or they can take energy away from you. A research project called the Spane Scale of emotion. Researchers were able to take 25000 subjects and put them in a room. And they were able to measure the frequency leaving the human body. And do you know what the most powerful frequency to leave the human body is? The frequency of authenticity. Authenticity is 4000 more powerful than love. You know when authenticity happens? Authenticity happens when your words are truthful, and you believe what you’re saying.”

“One of my green flags for intellect is someone being able to say that they don’t know. It’s almost inverted at this point, because i think at some point during school, if a teacher calls on you and you say you don’t know you’re punished for that and so we have such a repetitive cycle of both having it happen to us and watching people like us having a punishing experience, that it is very hardcore taught to us to never say that we don’t know. But that most basic lie tells us over and over again to never say what we actually think. And if we don’t know, then that might be one of the easiest ways to start telling the truth.”

“If you’re hiding a friend in your attic, and a gang member comes to the door and asks if he’s there, the “question” is not real. They are really saying “If you’re friend is here i will come in and kill him.”
And to that statement, you can truthfully say ‘No’.”

“Between what is said but not meant, and what is ment but not said, most of love is lost.”
Khalil Gibran

“I think 99 times and find nothing. I stop thinking, swim in silence, and the truth comes to me.”
– Albert Einstein

“To reveal the depth of your pain is to risk the world’s indifference.”
– Nietzsche

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When a someone beats a rug, the blows are directed at the dust, not the rug.
– Rumi

“What someone does, is what they intended to do all along”
“The choices that someone makes, are the choice they intended to make all along”

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“Not all who wander is lost”

“You are not lazy, you are lost”

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Loving people harder don’t make them love you back.

The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again.
– Charles Dickens

All things pass. None of them is yours. You can hold them for a while, but then you must let them go.
– Eckhart Tolle

“I loved you, and i still do… but i no longer want to love you”
– Dostoevsky

“I once loved a flower so much, that instead of cutting it, i left it alone.”
Osho

If you like a flower, you pick it. If you love a flower, you water it.
– Lao Tzu

“We cut a flower because we find it perfect. But we cut ourselves because we find that we’re not”

“You don’t trust that someone’s never gonna betray you. You just trust that you’ll be able to handle it if they do. That you’ll be able to walk away. Stop worrying about weather you can trust someone else. Maybe you can’t. We don’t know that. Thats a pointless waste of your time. Worry only about yourself.”

“To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved.”
Leo Tolstoy

“Imagine for a moment, at the beginning of your life, you were given a human, and you were told. Hey Drew, you have one job, for the rest of the life you have to take care of this human. Most of us, has not realised that thats our job. We finish our parenting, we were raised by someone else and we start looking for someone else to show up for us. But we, are our human. The only person who is truly here to take care of Matthew is me. He’s in my custody. And when you wake up in the morning and you say, what would i do today if i was taking care of my human. The answer is completely different to what we do most days, when we beat ourselves up, when we put ourselves around toxic people. Or around people who don’t treat us well. Its completely different, and what it makes us realise, and this is the big mistake, loving ourselves, isn’t a feeling, it’s an approach, its a job. You don’t even have to like yourself today to love yourself. Liking yourself can come later. With all of the ways that you make yourself proud and all of the things you do. Loving yourself today is your job. Because we are that human we were told to take care of.”

“The opposite of ‘i will never find love again’ is ‘i will, always, find love’. It sounds radical, but when you say ‘ill always find love. Ill find it everywhere’ everything starts to love you back. Try this: Go into a coffee shop or someplace you like to go. Go in thinking your most painful thought ‘ill never find love again, ill never find love again, ill never find love again’ and watch how people react to you. The next day go in again, but this time you have to repeat the opposite in your head ‘ill always find love everywhere, ill always find love everywhere, ill always find love everywhere’ and watch how people react to you. They will smile at you, they will give you free stuff, they will look at you with joy. Im telling you, its just what happens.”

“
If you’re confused about why you love this person, its love.
If you love someone because they love you, it’s empathy.
If you love someone for their looks, it’s obsession.
If you love someone for their money, it’s interest.
If you love someone because of their kindness, it’s admiration.
“

“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”
– Buddha

“If you could have done it all again. I would have loved you better. But i could not have loved you more.”
– Sue Zhao

“Weather its love, loyalty or support. If you have to ask for it, it has lost its value”

“It’s impossible for someone who destroys your mental health to be the love of your life. Unhealthy love often feels exciting, dramatic and profound but hurts us in the long run. Healthy love often feels dull peaceful and repetitive but it heals us in the long run.”

“If you fall in love with the flower and not the root, you’ll be disappointed when summer ends.”

“Love that is not unconditional is not love. Because you can have a parent that says, “i’ll love you if you stay out of jail. I’ll love you if you get good grades. I’ll love you if you’re not gay. I’ll love you if, you know, whatever””

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Sometimes when you’re in a dark place, you think you’ve been buried, but actually, you’ve been planted.

Throw roses into the abyss and say: “here’s my thanks to all monsters who didn’t succeed in swallowing me alive.”
– Friedrich Nietzsche

Suffering teaches what comfort cannot: resilience, empathy, and humility

“Absolutely have to have dark in order to have light. Cant have dark. Got to have opposites. Dark and light, light and dark, continually in painting. You have light on light, you have nothing. You have dark on dark, you basically have nothing. You know, its like in life, you got to have a little sadness so you know when the good times come. “
– Bob Ross, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTMxjADudbc

“If you’re tired, learn to rest, not to quit”

“When you’re sad and you listen to sad music, your brain releases a neurochemical called prolactin. Which is a soothing tranquillising hormone. The same one released between mothers and infants during nursing. Your brain produces its own opiates, not the kind you take in a pill, well basically the kind you take in a pill, but they’re endogenous, internally generated, and thats an analgesic, it helps relieve pain and it lifts your mood at the same time when you listen to music you like. And you know a lot of people wonder what kind of music is the most helpful and it doesn’t matter the genre it just matters that you like it.”

“Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak.”
– Sun Tzu

“People don’t cry because they are weak, they cry because they have been strong for too long”

“What you find is that the real masters of gratitude. They will wake up in the morning and they will say, ‘i’m really grateful for all the wonderful, beautiful things that are going to happen today. And i’m also really grateful for the things i don’t like today. Im grateful for those things because i know retrospectively, that that is gonna be the source of my growth.’”

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All she had for him was pity, and pity is the death of desire
– V for vendetta

“In order to control myself, i must first accept myself, by going with and not against my nature.”

Socrates did not lend his mind to share the poor passions of the flesh.

“Lust is the craving for salt of a man who is dying of thirst.”
– Frederick Buechner

If you dont take breaks to relax then your body will find a way to take breaks for you. And it will not be in a way or at a time that aligns with your plans.

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“truth, justice, kindness, and moderation”

“In this world there is only one thing of value, to live out your life in truth and justice, tolerant of those who are neither true nor just.”

“Dig inside yourself. Inside there is a spring of goodness ready to gush at any moment, if you keep digging.”

“‘No soul’, says plato, ‘likes to be robbed of truth’ – and the same holds of justice, moderation, kindness, and all such virtues. Essential that you should keep this constantly in your mind: this will make you more gentle to all.”

“When you have done good and another has benefitted, why do you still look, as fools do, for a third thing besides – credit for good works, or a return?”

“No one tires of receiving benefit: and action in accordance with nature is your own benefit. Do not then tire of benefit gained by benefit given.”

“Not possible to study. But possible to rein in arrogance; possible to triumph over pleasures and pains; possible to rise above mare glory; possible not to be angry with the unfeeling and the ungrateful, and even, yes, to care for them.”

“The good must be something beneficial, and of concern to the wholly good person. No wholly good person would regret missing a pleasure. Therefore pleasure is neither beneficial nor a good.”

“Injustice is sin. When the universal Nature has constituted rational creatures for the sake of each other – to benefit one another as deserved, but never to harm – anyone contravening her will is clearly guilty of sin against the oldest of the gods: because universal Nature is the nature of ultimate reality, to which all present existence is related.
Lying, too, is a sin against the same goddess: her name is Truth, and she is the original cause of all that is true. The conscious liar sins to the extent that their deceit causes injustice: the unconscious liar to the extent that he is out of tune with the nature of the Whole and out of order with the nature of the ordered universe against which he fights. And it is fighting when he allows himself to be carried in opposition to the truth. He has received the prompts from nature: by ignoring them he is now incapable of distinguishing false from true.
Moreover, the pursuit of pleasure as a good and the avoidance of pain as an evil constitutes sin. Someone like that must inevitably and frequently blame universal Nature for unfair distribution as between bad men and good, since bad men are often deep in pleasures and the possessions which make for pleasure, while the good often meet with pain and the circumstances which cause pain.
Further, anyone who fears pain will also at times be afraid of some future event in the world, and that is immediate sin. And a person who pursues pleasure will not hold back from injustice – an obvious sin.”

“If you can, show them the better way. If you cannot, remember that this is why you have the gift of kindness. The gods too are kind to such people, and in their benevolence even help them achieve some ends – health, wealth, fame. You can do it too. Or tell me – who is stopping you? “

“Either the gods have power or they do not. Now, if they have no power, why pray? If they do have power, why not pray for their gifts of freedom from all worldly fear, desire, or regret, rather than for the presence of absence of this or that? Certainly, if the gods can cooperate with men, they can cooperate to these ends.
But you might say: “The gods have put these things in my own power.” Is it not then better to use your power in freedom rather than show a servile and supine concern for what you cannot control? And who told you that the gods do not help us even to the ends which lie within our own power. At any rate, pray about these things, and you will see.
One man prays: “How can i sleep with that woman?” Your prayer is: “How can i lose the desire to sleep with her?”
Another prays: “How can i be rid of that man?” You pray: “How can i stop wanting to be rid of him?”
Another: “How can i save my little child?” You: “How can i learn not to fear his loss?” And so on.
Give all your prayers this turn, and observe what happens.”

“Picture everyone voicing pain or discontent at anything, as like a pig at a sacrifice, kicking and squealing. Just the same is the man who keeps it to himself, silently resentful on his bed. Think of all the threads that bind us, and who only rational creatures are given the choice of submitting willingly to events: pure submission is forced on all. “

“Whenever you take offence at the wrong done by another, move on at once to consider what similar wrong you are committing – it could be setting value on money, or pleasure, or reputation, and so on through the categories. This reflection will quickly damp your anger, aided by the further thought that the man is acting under compulsion – what else can he do? Or, if you can, remove the cause of his compulsion.”

“The rotten pretence of the man who says, ‘I prefer to be honest with you’! What are you on about, man? No need for this preface – the reality will show. It should be written on your forehead, immediately clear in the tone of your voice and the light of your eyes, just as the loved one can immediately read all in the glance of his lovers. In short, the good and honest man should have the same effect as the unwashed – anyone close by as he passes detects the aura, willy-nilly, at once. Calculated honesty is a stiletto. There is nothing more degrading than the friendship of wolves: avoid that about all. The good, honest, kindly man has it in his eyes, and you cannot mistake him.”

He says that it is unnecessary to say. He calls it a preface. He says that honesty can be and should be communicated with your tone of voice, expression and with the energy created from intention. This relates to the topic of intention, and how you can use thoughts to change your expression. For example, try looking at someone, and think to yourself “God she’s beautiful” and truly mean it. The look on your face will express the words you are thinking.

“Kindness is invincible – if it is sincere, not fawning or pretence. What can the most aggressive man do to you if you continue to be kind to him? If, as opportunity arises, you gently admonish him and take your time to re-educate him in the very moment when he is trying to do you harm? ‘No, son, we were born for other purposes than this. There is no way that I can be harmed, but you are harming yourself, son.’ And show him delicately how things are, making the general point that bees do not act like this, or any other creatures of gregarious nature. But your advice must not be ironic or critical. It should be affectionate, with no hurt feelings, not a lecture or a demonstration to impress others, but the way you would talk to someone by himself irrespective of company.”

“In Epicurean writings there is laid down the precept that one should continually keep in mind one of those who followed the path of virtue in earlier times. “

“I have often wondered how it is that everyone loves himself more than anyone else, but rates his own judgement of himself below that of others. Anyway, if a god or some wise tutor appeared at his side and told him to entertain no internal thought or intention which he won’t immediately broadcast outside, he would not tolerate this regime for a single day. So it is that we have more respect for what our neighbours will think of us than we have for ourselves. “

“If it is not right, don’t do it: if it is not true, don’t say it.”

“Realise at long last that you have within you something stronger and more numinous than those agents of emotion which make you a mare puppet on their strings. What is in my mind at this very moment? Fear, is it? Suspicion? Desire? Something else of that sort?”

“If you find anything in human life better than justice, truth, self-control, courage—better than the sufficiency of your own mind, which keeps you acting according to reason or fate, accepting what is allotted to you—then turn to it with all your soul and enjoy the supreme good you have found. But if nothing seems better than the divinity within you, which masters your impulses, examines your impressions, and withdraws from the body’s persuasions (as Socrates taught)—if nothing outshines this, why waste your effort on lesser things?”

“It never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own. If a god appeared to us—or a wise human being—and told us to stop entertaining thoughts we wouldn’t dare voice aloud, we wouldn’t tolerate it for a day. So why do we let others’ views outweigh our own?”

“The things you think about determine the quality of your mind. Your soul takes on the color of your thoughts. Soak it in this: If our life is short, nothing external matters—neither glory nor wealth. What matters is to live with purpose, to do what human nature demands.”

“If you can keep your head, when all about you is loosing theirs and blaming it on you. If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowances for their doubting to. If you can wait and not be tired of waiting, or being lied about, dont deal in lies, or being hated, dont give way to hating, and yet dont look to good, nor look too wise. If you can dream and not make dreams your master. If you can think and not make thoughts your aim. If you can meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two imposters just the same. If you can hear the truth you’ve spoken twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools or watch the things you gave your life for broken, and stoop and build them up with worn out tools. If you can make one heap of all your winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss and loose and start again at the beginning and never breathe a word about your loss.“
Rudyard Kipling

“I always liked the Socrates story where he goes into a marketplace, and they show him all these luxuries and fineries and he says. ‘how many things there are in this world that i do not want’. And thats a form of freedom. So not wanting something is as good as having it.”

Quotes

“Do not be ashamed of help. It is your task to achieve your assigned duty, like a soldier in a scaling-party. What, then, if your are lame and cannot climb the parapet by yourself, but this is made possible by anothers help?”

“Standing straight – or held straight.”

“If you light up a lamp for someone else, it will also brighten your path”
– Buddha

“A candle never loses its light while lighting up another candle.”
– Rumi

“Everything you want, sits on the other side of teaching other people how get it. Most people don’t know this but my 12 year old relatively successful youtube channel of him editing videos. And since he was a little kid i kept telling him. ‘hey man i know you wanna edit more videos, but the way you get better and more successful is helping other people edit their videos’”

“You can tell your kid, look it might be a unpleasant conversation that we have to have, but i’m on your side. And would like to get to the bottom of this. And there might be some scrapping along the way but i’m not gonna let you be miserable and drift away. And if you do that your kid will talk. And you’re gonna be afraid to delve into that, and fiar enough its no wonder your afraid. But pretending that its not happening thats a hell of a lot worse. And the longer you let it go on the more mess you’re gonna have to clean up- So remember that you love this person, and you dont want them to wander into a pit without you. ”

“Knowing your own darkness is the best method for dealing with the darkness of other people.”
– Carl Jung

Quotes

“It was that night i became aware of Gatsby’s extraordinary gift for hope. A gift that i have never found in any other person. And which it is not likely that i shall ever “

“Hope for the best. Prepare for the worst”

Quotes

“‘I am able to form the judgement i should about this event. If able, why troubled?’”

“All that lies outside my own mind is nothing to it.”

“For a rational being, to act in accordance with nature is also to act in accordance with reason.”

“In any given material circumstance what can be done or said to soundest effect? Whatever that is, it is in your power to do it or say it – and make no pretence of ‘obstacles in the way’. You will never cease moaning until you experience the same pleasure in making an appropriately human response to any circumstance you meet or face as the hedonist does in his indulgence – a response, that is, in keeping with man’s constitution. Because you should regard as enjoyment any action you can take in accord with your own nature; and you can do that anywhere. Now the roller does not have the gift of following its own movement wherever it will, nor does water or fire, or anything else subject to a nature or life without reason: there are many barriers or impediments in their way. But mind and reason have the power, by their nature and at their will, to movie through every obstacle. Keeping clear in your view this easy facility of reason to carry through all things – like fire rising, a stone falling, a roller on a slope – stop looking for anything more. Any remaining hindrance either come from the corpse which is our body, or – without the judgement and consent of our own reason itself – have no power at all to break or harm. “

“Only a madman looks for figs in winter: just as mad to hope for a child when the time of this gift is past. “

“No thief can steal your will” – so Epictetus.

“When you fret at any circumstance, you have forgotten a number of things. You have forgotten that all comes about in accordance with the nature of the Whole; that any wrong done lies with the other; further, that everything which happens was always so in the past, will be the same again in the future, and is happening now across the world; that a human being has close kinship with the whole human race – not a bond of blood or seed, but a community of mind. And you have forgotten this too, that every man’s mind is god and has flowed from that source; that nothing is our own property, but even our child, our body, or very soul have come from that source; that all is as thinking makes it so; that each of us lives only the present moment, and the present moment is all we lose.”

“The mind is a fortress: no external force can breach it unless it turns traitor to itself. All else—body, reputation, office—can be taken, but the mind remains impregnable if it chooses to retreat within its own walls. If it judges nothing outside itself to be its own, what can disturb it? External losses or blows cannot touch me unless I misjudge them as mine to grieve.”

“Wherever a man can live, he can live well—whether in a palace, a camp, or a desert. The life worth living is one shaped by reason and nature, and that can be done in any place, under any condition.”

“Things themselves have no power to shape our judgments. They stand still, lifeless, outside us. It is we who generate the opinions that unsettle us. Stop judging, and the storm subsides; the calm is in your hands.”

“Externals are neutral until my mind assigns them value. Reason’s sovereignty lies in this choice—to see events as they are, not as threats, and so preserve my peace.”

“When you’re shaken by impressions, apply reason at once: strip them bare, see them for what they are. Name them—fear, desire, grief—and they lose their grip. The mind, pure and rational, is stronger than these fleeting shadows.”

“To the rational being, the same act is at once according to nature and according to reason. Your purpose is one: to live as nature made you, a creature of thought and choice, not a slave to chance or instinct. Act deliberately rather than being swept along.”

“Ask yourself at every moment: ‘Is this necessary?’ Strip away what’s superfluous—thoughts, fears, excuses—and see how little stands in reason’s way. The soul moves lightest when it carries only what nature demands.”

“Confine your attention to the task at hand—be it action, thought, or endurance—and let the past and future fall away. Reason rules the present; that is enough. To live forever is not in your power, but to live rightly now is.”

“Love only what falls your way and is fated for you. What could suit you more than that?”

“You must compose your life action by action, and be satisfied if each action achieves its own end as best can be: and noone can prevent you from that achievement. “but there will be some external obstacle.” No obstacle, though, to justice, self-control, and reason. “But perhaps some other source of action will be obstructed.” Well, gladly accept the obstruction as it is, make a judicious change to meet the given circumstance, and another action will immediately substitute and fit into the composition of your life as discussed.”

“Do not let the panorama of your life oppress you, do not dwell on all the various troubles which may have occurred in the past or may occur in the future. Just ask yourself in each instance of the present: “What is there in this work which I cannot endure or support?” You will be ashamed to make any such confession. Then remind yourself that it is neither the future nor the past which weighs on you, but always the present: and the present burden reduces, if only you can isolate it and accuse your mind of weakness if it cannot hold agains something thus stripped bare.”

Quotes

“Every saint has a past, every sinner has a future”

“Every villain is a victim whose story hasn’t been told.”
Chris Colfer

Quotes

You do not resent your weight, do you – that you weigh only so many pounds and not three hundred? So why resent either a life-span of so many years and not more? Just as you are content with the amount of matter allocated to you, so you should be content with your allocation of time.

Imagine you were now dead, or had not lived before this moment. Now view the rest of your life as a bonus, and live it as nature directs.

Natures aim for everything includes its cessation just as much as its beginning and its duration – like someone throwing up a ball. How can it be good for the ball on the way up and bad on the way down, or even when it hits the ground? How can it be good for a bubble when it forms, and bad when it bursts? A candle is a similar example.

Loss is nothing more than change. Universal nature delights in change, and all that flows from nature happens for the good. Similar things have happened from time everlasting, and there will be more such to eternity.

One bitten by the true doctrines need only a very short and commonplace reminder to lose all pain and fear – for instance:
‘The wind scatters one year’s leaves on the ground… so it is with the generations of men’
Your children are no more than ‘leaves’. ‘Leaves’ too these loud voices of loyal praise, these curses from your opponents, this silent blame or mockery: mere ‘leaves’ likewise those with custody of your future fame. All these ‘come round in the season of spring’: but then the wind blows them down, and the forest ‘puts out others’ in their stead. All things are short-lived – this is their common lot – but you pursue likes and dislikes as if all was fixed for eternity. In a little while you too will close your eyes, and soon there will be others mourning the person who buries you.

Epictetus used to say that when you kiss your child you should say to yourself: “Tomorrow you may be dead.” ‘But these are ominous words!’ “No,” he replies, “Nothing is ominous which points to a natural process. Otherwise it would be ominous to speak of the corn being reaped.”

If, then, when you finally come close to your exit, you have left all else behind and value only your directing mind and the divinity within you, if your fear is not that you will cease to live, but that you never started a life in accordance with nature, then you will be a man worth of the universe that gave you birth. You will no longer be a stranger in your own country, no longer meet the day’s event as if bemused by the unexpected, no longer hang on this or that.

What more do you want? To live on? Or is it to continue sensation and impulse? To wax and then to wane? To make use of your voice, your mind? What in all this strikes you as good cause for regret? But if every one of these objects is contemptible, go on then to the final aim, which is to follow reason and to follow god. To value these other things, to fret at their loss which death will bring, militates against this aim.

Mortal man, you have lived as a citizen in this great city. What matter if that life is five or fifty years? The laws of the city apply equally to all. So what is there to fear in your dismissal from the city? This is no tyrant or corrupt judge who dismisses you, but the very same nature that brought you in. It is like the officer who engaged a comic actor dismissing him from the stage. “But u have not played my five acts, only three.” “True, but in life three acts can be the whole play.” Completion is determined by that being who caused first your composition and now your dissolution. You have no part in either causation. Go then in peace: the god who lets you go is at peace with you.

“Soon you’ll be ashes, or bones. A mere name, at most—and even that is just a sound, an echo. The things we want in life are empty, stale, trivial: dogs snarling, children squabbling, laughter turning to tears. Faith, modesty, justice, truth—these have fled ‘up from the wide-wayed earth to Olympus.’ What keeps you here, then? If the objects of sense are shifting and unstable, if our souls are just a vapor of blood, if fame in such a world is worthless—why wait? Calmly await your end, whether it’s extinction or something else.”

“Think of the whole of existence, of which you have a tiny share; think of all time, of which a brief, minuscule span has been assigned to you; think of fate, and how small a part you play in it.”

“Death: a release from impressions of the senses, from the tug of desire, from the mind’s wandering, from the servitude of the flesh.”

“Do what nature demands now—as if it were your last act. Speak truth, seek justice, as if this were your final breath. Bear what comes from fate, as if this were your end. No hesitation, no pretence, no vanity—just the straight path of nature’s law.”

“To die fighting to be free,
what more fitting end could be?
better that i say my sooth,
i’m gonna die demanding truth
while i’m still akin to youth
better now than later on
now that fear of death is gone
never mind another dawn”
If i get shot. It has to be because someone don’t like me for what i believe or have done. And i die for them. And let me tell you if someone want to get you, see i know the Quran Islamic Bible. It says “Not one soul comes on earth without the permission of Allah our god. Not one soul leaves without the permission”. When you die its time..
– Muhammed Ali, https://www.youtube.com/shorts/BUpecT_CVMk?feature=share

One big anxiety resolve for me is just ruminating on death. I think thats a good one. You’re gonna die. It’s all going to zero. You cant take anything with you. If you can keep the idea in front of you at all times that you are going to die, and that everything goes literally to zero whats there to stress about.

“I dont know if you’ve ever read Tich Nhat Hanh’s work the buddhist monk. Thich Nhat Hanh was nominated for the nobel peace price in the 80’s. He wrote some beautiful books, one of them being ‘Peace is a beautiful one’. He as a buddhist monk has this mindfulness exercise: When you hug someone, think about the fact that they’re there and you’re hugging them, then close your eyes, and imagine that they’ve died. Imagine that they have died right there in your arms and you now are holding their corpse. This is the last time you’re hugging them before you let go of their body so it can be burried. And then remember that they are alive and you are hugging them. They are not dead yet. They are alive and healthy, right there between your arms.”

“Because we do not know when we will die, we get to think of life as an inexhaustible well, and yet everything happens only a certain number of times. And a really small number really. How many more times will you remember a certain childhood memory? A memory that is such a essential part of your childhood that you cant even conceive of your life without it. 8 times more? maybe less? How many more times will you watch the sun go down over an ocean? prehaps 20. And yet it all seems limitless.”

“People say the same things on their deathbed. They all say the same things. Some version of: i wish i’d worked less. I wish i’d spent more time with my friends and family, I wish i’d allowed myself to be happy. I wish i’d lived my life and not the life that other people expected of me. These are so common. They are so universal. For me, through the lens of how we want to make change that last. We think about what people regret on their deathbed, and go ‘how can we apply tools now so that we are not on our deathbed one day with the same regrets?’”

“Two weeks before my wife died she told me and our daughter ‘I know the end is very near now.’ and she said ‘Please let me go’ and me and our daughter told her ‘Yes, you have our blessing to go’ . Joan said to my daughter and i four days before she died, ‘i know that you will be sad, but try and find one pocket of happiness in each day.’ witch was a brilliant mantra. More than anything she said ‘I know that you will be sad, but every single one of us, including you two are going to die. So don’t have any guilt about feeling joy or happiness after i’m gone’. And that has been an amazing thing.”

Quotes

Grief is not just an emotion, its an unraveling. A space where something once lived but is now gone. It carves through you. Leaving a hollow ache where love once resided. In the beginning it fe

Quotes

Quotes

Quotes

“One of the ways that i learned to help people who were socially anxious was to tell them to stop thinking about how comfortable they were in a new social situation. And do nothing but attend extremely diligently to trying to make the person they were talking with comfortable. “

“You have to trust your future self, to handle future problems. It has to do with dealing with anxiety and uncertainty. My mom was in the hospital for a month and things looked really bad. The doctors told us she wasn’t gonna make it. I was just riddled with anxiety and anticipatory grief. But i had a family friend who was an oncologist, so a lot of experience dealing with death and loss. And when i told him that i didnt know weather i could handle it if she died, he told me ‘Emily, the version of you, that will handle that, if or when that terrible thing happens, will be born into existence in that moment. You have to trust your future self, to handle future problems.’”

Quotes

“Observe the flux of all things. It’s our nature to be part of this change and transformation—to resist it is to resist the order of the universe. Everything exists to be transformed, to be broken down and built anew, just as the elements themselves are endlessly recombined.”

“Everything material soon disappears into the universal substance; every cause is absorbed into the universal reason; every memory of anything is buried in eternity.”

“Think of the whole of existence, of which you take up so small a part; think of the whole of time, where a brief and fleeting portion is all you’re allotted; think of fate—what part of it are you?”

“Universal nature uses the substance of the universe like wax, making now the model of a horse, then melting it down and using its material for a tree; next for a man; next for something else. Each one of these subsists for only the briefest time. It is no more hardship for a folded paper to be unfolded than for it to be folded again into something new.”

“All that you see will in a moment be changed by the nature which governs the whole: it will create other things out of this material, and then again others of of that, so that the world is always young.”

“The recurrent cycles of the universe are the same, up and down, from eternity to eternity. And either the mind of the Whole has a specific impulse for each individual case – if so, you should welcome the result – or it had a single original impulse, from which all else follows in consequence: and why should you be anxious about that? The Whole is either a god – then all is well: or if purposeless – some sort of random arrangement of atoms or molecules – you should not be without purpose yourself. In a moment the earth will cover us all. Then the earth too will change, and then further successive changes to infinity. One reflection on these waves of change and transformation, and the speed of their flow, will hold all mortal things in contempt.”

“Constantly reflect that all the things which happen now have happened before: reflect too that they will happen again in the future. Have in your mind’s eye whole dramas with similar settings, all you know of from your own experience or earlier history – for example, the whole court of Hadrian, the whole court of Antonius, the whole court of Philip, Alexander, Croesus. All the same as now: just a different cast.”

“Time is a river, a violent current of events, glimpsed once and already carried past us, and another follows and is gone.”

“The whole universe is change, and life itself is but what we deem it “

Quotes

“Asia, Europe—are mere corners of the universe. All the oceans—a drop in the universe. Mount Athos—a clod of earth. The present moment—a speck in eternity. All things are small, changeable, vanishing.”

“You have lived just a fraction of the boundless expanse of time, and soon you’ll be swallowed up by eternity. And your possessions, how long will they last?”

“Look at the whole of existence, of which you’re a tiny part; look at the entirety of time, of which your life is a brief and fleeting portion; look at the chain of fate, of which your existence is but a single link.”

“Observe the movement of the stars as if you were running their course with them, and let your mind constantly dwell on the changes of the elements into each other. Such imaginations wash away the filth of life on the ground.”

“You can strip away many unnecessary troubles that lie wholly in your own judgment. You’ll make a large space for yourself at once by grasping the whole universe in your thought, by considering the eternity of time, and by reflecting on the rapid change of each particular thing.”

“Survey the circling stars, as though you were in mid-course with them. Often picture the changing and rechanging dance of the elements. Visions of this kind purge away the dross of our earth-bound life.”

“Further, when your talk is about mankind, view earthly things as if looking down on them from some point high above.The whole earth is just a mare point in space.”

“Take a view from above – look at the thousands of flocks and herds, the thousands of human ceremonies, every sort of voyage in storm or calm, the range of creation, combination, and extinction. Consider too the lives once lived by others long before you, the lives that will be lived after you, the lives lived now among foreign tribes; and how many have never even heard your name, how many will very soon forget it, how many may praise you now but quickly turn to blame. Reflect that neither memory nor fame, nor anything else at all, has any importance worth thinking of.”

“One light of the sun, even though its path is broken by walls, mountains, innumerable other obstacles. One common substance, even though it is broken up into innumerable forms if individual bodies. One animate soul, even though it is broken up into innumerable species with specific individualities. One intelligent soul, even though it appears divided.”

“What a tiny part of the boundless abyss of time has been allotted to each of us – and this is soon vanished in eternity; what a tiny part of the universal substance and the universal soul; how tiny in the whole earth the mere clod on which you creep. Reflecting on all this, think nothing important other than active pursuit where your own nature leads and passive acceptance of what universal nature brings.”

You’re a ghost driving a meat-coated skeleton made from stardust, riding a rock hurtling through space. Don’t fear anything, it should be fear you.

Quotes

“You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realise this, and you will find strength.”

“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking. The pursuit of excess—wealth, fame, or pleasures—leads not to joy but to restlessness.”

“The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts”

“‘And the heart within me laughed’”

“Relying on happiness is risky because what will you then have when tough times come and you cant feel happy, Instead you should rely on adventure. Adventure cannot protect you from suffering but it can justify it. People don’t regret what they did that did’t work”

Quotes

“Rational beings collectively have the same relation as the various limbs of an organic unity – they were created for a single cooperative purpose. The notion of this will strike you more forcefully if you keep of saying to yourself: “I am a limb of the composite body of all rational beings””

“Constantly think of the universe as one living being, with a single substance and a single soul; and how all things are referred to one perception—that of this one being; how it does everything with one impulse, and how all things cooperate in all that happens.”

“The universe is a single, living entity, with one substance and one soul. All things are interwoven with one another; all things are parts of one another. Nothing is isolated or detached from the whole.”

“Adapt yourself to the things with which your lot has been cast; love the people with whom fate has brought you together—but do so with all your heart. Your mind should be in harmony with the governing reason of the Whole.”

“All things are interwoven, and the bond is sacred; nothing is unconnected with anything else. For all things are ordered together, and together they make up one universe. There is one cosmos made of all things, one divine power pervading all, one substance, one law, one reason shared by all rational beings.”

“All that happens is woven into the fabric of fate—whether it’s the work of a divine power or the random collision of atoms. Either way, it’s part of the same tapestry: the whole of which you are a part.”

“Either all things proceed from one intelligent source and fit together as in a single body—or there are atoms, and nothing but a random scattering. Why then be anxious? Say to your ruling reason: ‘You’re part of this, whether it’s a unity or a chaos.”

“Whether the universe is a concord of atoms or a natural order, let this be your starting point: I am a part of the Whole, governed by its nature. I stand in relation to its parts, and I’ll neither resent what comes from it nor separate myself from my kin.”

“Whether atoms or a natural order, the first premise must be that i am part of the Whole which is governed by nature: the second, that i have some close relationship with the other kindred parts. Which these premises in mind, in so far as i am a part I shall not resent anything assigned by the Whole. Nothing which benefits the Whole can be harmful to the part, and the Whole contains nothing which is not to its benefit. All organic natures have this in common, but the nature of the universe has this additional attribute, that no external cause can force it to create anything harmful to itself. So remembering that I am part of the Whole so constituted will leave me happy with all that happens to me.”

“‘Earth loves the rain, the proud sky loves to give it.’ The whole world loaves to create futurity. I say then to the world, “I share your love.” Is this not the source of the phrase, ‘This loves to happen’?”

“One light of the sun, even though its path is broken by walls, mountains, innumerable other obstacles. One common substance, even though it is broken up into innumerable forms if individual bodies. One animate soul, even though it is broken up into innumerable species with specific individualities. One intelligent soul, even though it appears divided.”

“What a tiny part of the boundless abyss of time has been allotted to each of us – and this is soon vanished in eternity; what a tiny part of the universal substance and the universal soul; how tiny in the whole earth the mere clod on which you creep. Reflecting on all this, think nothing important other than active pursuit where your own nature leads and passive acceptance of what universal nature brings.”

“There was a monkey colony on Koshima Island in Japan. Scientists gave them sweet potatoes sprinkled with sand. The monkeys liked the potatoes, but didn’t like the sand and dirt on them. A monkey named Imo, discovered that this problem could be solved by washing the potatoes. It taught this trick to another monkey and soon many monkeys started washing the potatoes. Then suddenly, when the number of monkeys doing this on Koshima Island reached 100 all the monkeys on that island began washing potatoes without any external guidance. But the most curious thing was that at the same time, all the monkeys on the neighbouring island also started washing sweet potatoes. The concept of planetary consciousness expresses that thoughts are not only individual, but also a network of interaction and communication at the planetary level. This thought emphasises the existence of a kind of energy flow in the universe and that everything is interconnected. “

“Morphic resonance is the idea of memory in nature. The idea that the whole universe has a kind of memory. Each individual in his species draws on a collective memory and contributes to it. It works on the base of similarity any pattern of activity that is similar to a later pattern of activity in a self organising system influences it across space and time. So what it means in effect is that if you train rats to learn a new trick in Los Angeles then rats in New York and Sydney and London will learn the same thing quicker straight away. There’s actually evidence that this surprising effect happens.”

“Words have power. ‘Uhh they’re just sounds from a mammal’, no they’re not. They’re spells. We’re casting spells on each other- I do this on stage as a standup sometimes. I point to someone in the front row and i go, ‘thats a great shirt.’ ‘You made a great choice of that shirt’. And you can see, even though they know i’m just joking around and making a point, you can see it works. Sometimes i like to call other people ‘Me’. ‘This me is driving me to the airport’. I find that useful. I do it privately. Especially if anybody serving you or helping you, or you think ‘this is the flight attendant’. No ‘this me just brought me a sprite, thank you.’. ‘That me is doing great’. Instead of going ‘this flight attendant’ No thats a label we made so we feel okay about yelling at them that there should be more overhead space. No it should be ‘That me is doing my best’

“Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.”
– Charles Addams

Quotes

“I remember once, i was looking in the open air, and one of those glorious little thistle down things, dandelions, came flying. And i picked it out of the air. And brought it down. And it looked as if it was struggling to get away. Just as if you caught an insect and held it in one leg. It seemed to be struggling to get away and i thought well its not doing that, thats just the wind blowing. Then i thought again, really? Only the wind blowing? Surely, it is the structure of this thing, which in cooperation with the existence of wind enables it to move like an animal. But using the winds effort not its own. It is more intelligent than an insect. In a way. Because an insect uses effort. Like a person who rows a boat across the ocean. But then someone found that if you put up the sail you dont have to use any effort at all. You let nature do it for you. With the intelligence to use a sail. Now that is the most highly skilful art of all. That is Taoism in perfection.”
– Alan Watts
This relates to motivation in that working 12 hours a day on something can be incredibly difficult if you dont do something you like and are motivated to do. But if you are intelligent enough to find something that catches your interest and gives you motivation it is like setting up a sail that catches the wind. In some way interest and passion is like the wind. It is like a force that nature provides. And by utilising it you can get much further with less effort.

“Boys are confident, men are certain”
– Alex Hormozi

“Its not about doing whats best, its about doing whats required. Whenever i have a hard thing, I dont wanna make more videos for content right now. Like literally my immediate thought thats my subconscious is like, ‘I’ll do whats required’”
– Alex Hormozi

“List all the things that you aren’t willing to give up for the dreams that you have, and that is what the person who will beat you is willing to give up.”
– Alex Hormozi

“It doesnt make sense to continue wanting something, if you’re not willing to do what it takes to get it. If you don’t want to live the lifestyle. Then release yourself from the desire. To crave the result but not the process is to guarantee disappointment.”
– James Clear

Quotes

“If you had a stepmother and a mother at the same time, you would pay attention to your stepmother but nevertheless your constant recourse would be to your mother. That is how it is with court and philosophy. So return to philosophy again and again, and take your comfort in her: she will make the other life seem bearable to you, and you bearable in it. “

“Alexander, Julius Caesar, Pompey – what are they to Diogenes, Heraclitus, Socrates? These men saw into reality, its causes and its material, and their directing minds were their own masters. As for the former they were slaves to all their ambitions.”

“Go on, then talk to me now of Alexander and Philip and Demetrius of Phalerum. I shall follow them, if they saw the will of universal nature and took themselves to her school. But if they simply strutted a dramatic role, no one has condemned me to imitate them. The work of philosophy is simple and modest. Do not seduce me to pompous pride.”

“How clearly it strikes you that there is no other walk of life so conducive to the exercise of philosophy as this in which you now find yourself!”

“When you need to be restored, it is better to seek the simplest remedy: withdraw into yourself and commune with reason. Philosophy is this—nothing more than directing your mind to justice, truth, and self-mastery. In its embrace, you find peace, no matter the storms around you. This echoes the comfort of returning to philosophy, as a child to a mother, to make life bearable.”

“The pride of calling oneself a philosopher, or being thought one, is a trap. Instead, be content to live justly, to think clearly, to accept what comes. True philosophy seeks no applause—it is enough to align with nature’s reason. This speaks to the modesty of philosophy’s work, shunning the pomp of men like Alexander or Caesar.”

“Consider the lives of those who chased fame—emperors, generals, orators. Where are they now? Smoke, ash, a tale, or not even that. Then look to philosophy: it asks only that you act for the common good, bear what you must, and keep your mind free. Diogenes and Socrates saw this truth, while others were chained to their desires. This mirrors the contrast between ambition’s slavery and philosophy’s mastery.”

“Do not be troubled if you live in obscurity or face great trials. Philosophy thrives in any condition, for it depends only on your own soul. Whether in a palace or a prison, you can live by reason, honor virtue, and find contentment. This aligns with the thought that no walk of life is so suited to philosophy as the one you inhabit now.”

“All are lunatics, but those who can analyse their delusions are called philosophers”
Ambrose Bierce

“Everything that needs to be said has already been said. But since most didn’t listen, and the ones who did are gone, everything must be said again.”
– André Gide

Quotes

“Someone told me that the true measure of a man isn’t what he reveals to the world, but what he hides from it. Perhaps. Keeping secrets is brutal business.”

“If you have to choose, be the one who does things, not the one who is seen to do things.”

“You might say why would i want the responsibility without the glory. its like A, do you you want the glory, are you so sure that wouldn’t just get in your way? And B maybe you want the responsibility because thats the adventure. You actually get to do the thing that someone else just wants to take credit for.”

Quotes

“One of my favorite studies comes out of harvard business school. Alison Wood Brook wanted to know, how do we transform our nervousness into excitement. Heres what she did. She brought people into their lab, and she had them sing the song, Dont stop believing into a karaoke accuracy software. And she had three different trials. In the first trial, she had them come in and just sing the song. The second, she had them say out loud, “Im nervous”, the last group, she had them say “Im Excited” and then start singing. Heres what she found. People who just song had a 69% accuracy. People who said i’m nervous had a 53% accuracy. But among everyone who said “Im excited” there was a 80% accuracy. Mentally if we frame our nervousness and butterflies as excitement. It actually helps us harness that excitement for something good”
– Vanessa Van Edwards

Quotes

“If you were shamed in childhood, it ment that you were made to feel bad. Like you were bad. Not that you did bad things but that as a person you’re bad. Thats an unresolved problem. And you will then grow up. And you’ll look for a shamer in order to work the shaming issue through. Or you’ll do it to yourself, or you will do it to the partner that you connect with. And the whole thing is not that we just like repeating patterns. Pattern repeating is trying to resolve the pattern you’re repeating. You repeat it not to experience it again. But to not experience it again. But you keep on doing it because you don’t know of any other way to resolve it.”

“How old were you when your mother and father took took on the job of getting to know themselves, so as to not pass on their traumas to you? how old were you when they took that on?”

“So this guy in the 1870 was helping out in a prison. He found that 42 inmates all traced back to the same great great grandfather. So he had to figure out what happened. So he dove in and did a deep study. He found that it traced all the way back to a guy in New York named Max Jukes, he was a bum, a thug and a womanizer. He had 11 kids with a bunch of different women and a crazy life. And his stats over the 5 generations are insane. 310 people died because of crime related incidents. 400 drunks, 190 prostitutes, 150 more criminals and 7 murderers. Then he compared it to another family at the exact same time. His name was Jonathan Edwards, also had almost a dozen kids, and he lived right near him. He was a teacher, and he was a pastor. And this is what his 5 next generations showed. 13 collage presidents, 65 collage professors, 75 military leaders, 80 public servants, 60 authors, 60 doctors, 30 judges, 100 pastors, 100 lawyers, 3 U.S senators, and a U.S vice president. Parents do not realise that the decisions that they make today, have ripple effects for generations.”

“The shames that you have in your life, the ones that are the worst, if you look at them they are usually the dark side of the stuff that you are the most prod of about yourself.
So if you look at you as a musician, and when it comes to writing a record or mastering a track, that is where your obsessiveness gets deployed in a very productive manner. Its what keeps you going until its perfect. Do you appreciate that about yourself, the fact that you have this precision in your artform? Yes? Well guess what you have to pay for that.
“

“Its very simple if in early childhood you are given the sense that you are valued, just because you existed. Your parents welcome you and value you and celebrate you just because you are. Then you don’t have to keep proving it afterwards. But if you don’t get that sense. Then you have to be important. So that sense of needing to be important, comes from the sense of missing out of being valued for who you are. My parents, bless their souls. But they valued my intelligence, and so a lot of my persona was caught up in being smart and proving my value that way. Well its good to be intelligent, but your value shouldn’t depend on any one quality, weather your cute or cuddly or handsome or successful or good at sports or smart at school. Your value us intrinsic. Its innate. Inherent because you are human.”

“The crux of childhood trauma is not being acknowledged and honoured for who they were as kids. The big thing is that they were unseen and people did terrible tings to them and nobody seemed to bother to protect them. Critical issue is that trauma is about being helpless and nobody coming to your rescue. So its very important to have the experience that if you really cannot do something or you’re scared that somebody comes to your help at this point. And you get an imprint that even when i feel really bad, somebody will come there and be there for me. And that is what many people miss. We see this all the time in our practice, people have a violent parent, usually the father but not always, and then the other partner turns a blind eye. And doesn’t say, ill take care of you even though the other parent is hurting you. And the betrayal of a parent to let the other parent do terrible things to them and not say ‘no you cannot do this to my kid’ is a huge thing for many people. Having had bystanders who do not come to your help. Very big deal yeah.”

Quotes

“The most dangerous is the one you decorate with comfort and think of as freedom.”

“When you are reluctant to get up from your sleep, remind yourself that it is your constitution and man’s nature to perform social acts, whereas sleep is something you share with dumb animals. Now what accords with the nature of each being is thereby the more closely related to it, the more in its essence, and indeed the more to its liking.”

Your actions show your nature. If your actions is to stay give into drowsiness and escape into unnecessary sleep, then that is your nature. This is the nature of animals not of man. So if your actions is those then your nature is more closely related to animals than to that of man.

“At dawn, when you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself: ‘I have to go to work—as a human being. What do I have to complain of, if I’m going to do what I was born for—the things I was brought into the world to do? Or is this what I was created for? To huddle under the blankets and stay warm?’”

“His name is David Levari, and he calls it prevalence-induced concept change. And it basically finds that as people experience fewer and fewer problems, we don’t actually become more satisfied, we simply sort of lower our threshold for what we consider a problem. So when you apply that to life today to make this practical. Its like, as the world has become a lot more comfortable, as we encounter fewer sort of traumas and real problems in our life, we don’t necessarily stop and go, this is amazing. We simply broaden our definition of what a problem is, and of what a discomfort is. And so we end up with the exact same number of problems and discomforts.”

Quotes

“Whenever you suffer pain, have ready to hand the thought that pain is not a moral evil and does not harm your governing intelligence: pain can do no damage either to its rational or to its social nature. In most cases of pain you should be helped too by the saying of Epicurus: ‘pain is neither unendurable nor unending, as long as you remember its limits and do not exaggerate it in your imagination.’ Remember too that many things that we find disagreeable are the unrecognised analogues of pain – drowsiness, for example, oppressive heat, loss of appetite. So when you find yourself complaining of any of these, say to yourself, ‘you are giving into pain’.”

“When you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment. If the distress comes from something within your own character, who prevents you from correcting your judgment? This ties to pain’s dependence on perception, urging you to govern your mind rather than let sensations rule.”

“Wipe out imagination: check impulse: quench desire: keep the ruling reason in its own control. Pain, like all else, is fleeting when you confine your attention to the moment, refusing to amplify it with fears of past or future.”

“All that happens is as usual and familiar as the rose in spring or the fruit in summer: so too with disease, death, slander, intrigue, and all that delights or pains the foolish. Pain is natural, not to be resisted but understood as part of life’s cycle, neither good nor evil.”

“Things cannot touch the soul, for they are external and remain outside; disturbance comes only from the soul’s own judgment. The mind, when it holds to reason, remains untouched by pain’s fleeting impressions”

“Pain is but a sensation, often sharper in the mind than in the body. It tests your resolve, yet it holds no power beyond what you grant it. See it as a messenger, not a master—teaching endurance, not dictating your state. Reason strips it of terror: it is not evil, only a part of nature’s course.”

“A soldier, wounded in battle, lay under the stars, his leg torn by a spear. The pain gnawed like a beast, urging him to curse fate and despair. Yet he fixed his eyes on the sky, where constellations wheeled in silent order. He thought, “This wound is but a moment. My mind remains my own, untouched by steel or suffering.” Breathing steadily, he recalled his duty—to stand firm, not for glory, but for what was right. The pain did not lessen, but its grip on him weakened. By dawn, he rose, limping, yet unbroken, carrying his resolve like a shield. Pain is only what you allow it to be. It strikes the body but seeks to conquer the mind. Hold fast to reason, and it becomes a fleeting guest, not a ruler.”

A merchant, prosperous and respected, sat alone in his grand house, his heart heavy with a different kind of pain—not of the body, but of loss. His only son had turned from him, chasing fleeting pleasures, scorning the virtues the merchant held dear. The ache was not in his flesh but in his soul, a gnawing sense of failure and severed bonds. Each night, he replayed their last words, sharp as blades, and felt the sting of what could have been.
One evening, he walked to the marketplace, now quiet, and sat by a fountain. He watched the water flow—steady, untroubled, moving past every obstacle. He thought, “This pain is real, yet it is not my whole being. My son chooses his path, as I choose mine. I cannot force his heart, but I can govern my own. To love him still, to act with justice and patience—this is my power.” The sorrow lingered, but it no longer ruled him. He returned home, resolved to live rightly, trusting time and virtue to mend what words could not.
Pain takes many forms—grief, shame, betrayal—yet all are shadows cast by the mind’s judgment. Like water, they flow and pass unless you clutch them. Reason reveals their limits: they touch you only as far as you permit. Hold to what is in your control—your thoughts, your actions—and no pain, however sharp, can bind your soul.”

“You’re gonna have pain one way or the other. Which pain would you like? Cause sometimes in life there is no pain-free options. You can have the pain of suppressing yourself, for the sake of being accepted. Or you can have the pain of being yourself and sometimes not being accepted. You’re gonna have pain one way or the other, but the pain of not being yourself, ultimately is by far greater and more a chronic pain. The short term pain of being ourselves brings liberation.”

“Pain is certain, suffering is optional”
– Buddha

“The root of suffering is attachment”
– Buddha

“The pain you have today, is the strength that you’ll have tomorrow”

“Sometimes time does not heal, it just teaches you to live in the pain”

Quotes

“Emotions are stirrings of the soul, fleeting impressions that arise when the mind meets the world. They are neither good nor evil in themselves, but signals. Like waves, they pass through you, shaped by your judgments. Reason alone decides their weight; unchecked, they cloud the truth, but guided, they serve as guides to virtue. Master them, and they become allies; cling to them, and they become chains.”

“Emotions are reactions in the mind, sparked by what you perceive—joy at a friend’s success, grief at a loss, anger at a slight. They are felt as urges or tensions, like a racing heart or a tightened chest, tied to your beliefs about what matters.”

“Emotions are triggered by what you notice—say, a harsh word or a kind gesture—and hit you as physical changes: your pulse races, your palms sweat, or your chest warms. These feelings depend on what you think the event means—if you believe the traffic slight was personal, anger flares; if you think it’s just haste, it fades. They’re short-lived, tied to your view of the moment, and you can steer them by rethinking what’s true.”

“Emotions are neurophysiological responses triggered by external or internal stimuli, such as a loud noise or a memory. They manifest as measurable changes—elevated heart rate, adrenaline release, or neural activity in areas like the amygdala—coupled with subjective feelings like anger, joy, or fear. These responses arise from cognitive appraisals: if you perceive a snake as a threat, fear activates; if you see it as harmless, calm prevails. Shaped by brain processes and past experiences, emotions drive behavior but can be modulated by conscious reasoning, altering how you interpret the stimulus.”

“Emotions are not pain or pleasure themselves, but they can give rise to both. Joy may bring a sense of pleasure, like warmth in the chest when you help another; anger or grief can spark pain, like a knot in the gut when betrayed. Yet these sensations stem from how you judge the emotion’s cause—if you deem a loss unbearable, grief cuts deeper; if you accept it as nature’s way, the pain softens”

“An emotion can exist without causing pain or pleasure if you meet it with detachment. Consider curiosity when pondering a stranger’s words—it stirs your mind but need not bring joy’s warmth or anger’s sting.”

“If you feel it in your chest, its fear.
If you feel it in your stomach it’s intuition.
if you feel it in your head it’s anger.
if you feel it in your muscles it’s anxiety.
if you feel it in your face, it’s shame.
if you feel it in your mouth, it’s disgust.
if you feel it in your throat, it’s sadness.
if you feel it throughout your whole body, its happiness.
“

Quotes

“Do not blame the gods: they do no wrong, willed or unwilled. Do not blame men either: all their wrongs are unwilled. No one, then, should be blamed.”

“Whenever you meet someone, ask yourself first this immediate question: ‘what beliefs does this person hold about the good and bad in life?’ Because if they believe this or that about pleasure and pain, and their constituents, about fame and obscurity, death and life, then i shall not find it surprising or strange if they act in this or that way, and i shall remember that they have no choice but to act as they do.”

“It would be absurd to be surprised at a fig-tree bearing figs.”

“When another blames you or hates you, or people voice similar criticisms, go to their souls, penetrate inside and see what sort of people they are. You will realise that there is no need to be racked with anxiety that they should hold any particular opinion about you. But you should still be kind to them. They are by nature your friends, and the gods too help them in various ways – dreams and divination – at least to the objects of their concern. “

“What are the directing minds of these people? What are they set on, what governs their likes and values? Train yourself to look at their souls naked. When they think that their blame will hurt or their praise advantage, what a conceit that is!”

“Whenever you are offended at someone’s lack of shame, you should immediately ask yourself: ‘So is it possible for there to be no shameless people in the world?’ It is not possible. Do not then ask for the impossible. This person is just one of the shameless inevitably existing in the world. Have the same thought ready for the rouge, the traitor, every sort of offender. The recognition that this class of people must necessarily exist will immediately make you kinder to them as individuals. Another useful thought of direct application is the particular virtue nature has given us to counter a particular wrong. Gentleness is given as the antidote to cruelty, and other qualities to meet other offences. In general, you can always re-educate one who has lost their way: and anyone who does wrong has missed their proper aim and gone astray.
And what harm have you suffered? You will find that none of these who excite your anger has done anything capable of affecting your mind for the worse: and it is only in your mind that damage or harm can be done to you – they have no other existence.
Anyway, where is the harm or surprise in the ignorant behaving as the ignorant do? Think about it. Should you not rather blame yourself, for not anticipating that this person would make this error? Your reason gave you the resource to reckon this mistake likely from this man, yet you forgot and are now surprised that he went wrong.
Above all, when you complain of disloyalty or ingratitude, turn inwards on yourself. The fault is clearly your own, if you trusted that a man of that character would keep his trust, or if you conferred a favour without making it an end in itself, your very action its own and complete reward. What more do you want, man, from a kind act? Is it not enough that you have done something consonant with your own nature – do you now put a price on it? As if the eye demanded a return for seeing, or the feet for walking. Just as these were made for a particular purpose, and fulfil their proper nature by acting in accordance with their own constitution, so man was made to do good: and whenever he does something good or otherwise contributory to the common interest, he has done what he was designed for, and inherits his own.”

“Presented with the impression that someone has done wrong, how do i know that this was a wrong? And if it was indeed a wrong, how do i know that he was not already condemning himself, which is the equivalent to tearing his own face? Wanting the bad man not to do wrong is like wanting the fig-tree not to produce rennet in its figs, babies not to cry, horses not to neigh, or any other inevitable fact of nature. What else can he do with a state of mind like his? So if you are really keen, cure his state. “

“Continually review in your mind those whom a particular anger took to extremes, those who reached the greatest heights of glory or disaster or enmity or any other sort of fortune. Then stop and think: where is it all now? Smoke and ashes, a story told or even a story forgotten. At the same time this whole class of examples should occur to you. Think how worthless all this striving is: how much wiser to use the material given you to make yourself in all simplicity just, self-controlled, obedient to the gods. The pride that prides itself on freedom from pride is the hardest of all to bear. “

“If someone does wrong, consider why they did it. Once you see their motives—ignorance, fear, or misguided desire—the act loses its sting. Either their soul is troubled, and you should pity them, or they act without true harm to you, for only your own mind can be harmed by your own choices.”

“Do not despise others’ faults, but consider their directing minds. Ask: What are they aiming at? What do they love or fear? If you see their actions as products of their beliefs—however misguided—you will not be surprised or angered. Their errors are like a stone falling; they act as they must, given their understanding. “

“When someone wrongs you, first consider what good or harm they thought they were doing. When you see their mistake, you’ll pity them rather than hate them, for they act from ignorance of what is truly good. You, too, are not perfect in judging good and evil, so bear with them as they bear with you. “

“How much better to correct than to resent? Consider nine principles: First, we are made for mutual help, not harm. Second, their actions cannot touch your soul unless you let them. Third, if they err, it harms them more than you. Fourth, truth never suffers from honest inquiry. Fifth, their ignorance is not malice—be patient, as with a child. Sixth, death levels all, so why feud? Seventh, your own judgment creates your pain, not their deeds. Eighth, anger hurts you more than the offense. Ninth, kindness is invincible if sincere.”

“Think of the countless souls who have quarreled, envied, hated, or fought. Where are they now? Dust. Why then be vexed by others’ errors? They act as their nature compels, just as you do. Focus on your own duty—to act justly and accept what comes. This recalls the absurdity of expecting a fig-tree not to bear figs or being surprised by human flaws.”

“If someone treats you ill, why wonder? Reflect instead on whether you expected too much or misjudged their character. The fault lies not in their action but in your surprise. Correct your own assumptions, and you’ll find peace.”

“As honey tastes sweet to all, so should you see others as kin, bound by the same nature. Their errors are not attacks but stumbles in the dark. Help where you can, endure where you must, and remember you share the same mortal lot.”

“If we see people for what they are, we make them worse. If we see them as what they could be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming. “

“Butterflies cant see their own wings”

“If you’re a poet, and you come across a swordsman, draw your sword. You dont start reciting poetry. “
Robert Greene

“If you are lonely when you’re alone you are in bad company.”
Jean-Paul Sartre

“Most people are just sinners judging other sinners for sinning differently”
Sui Ishida

“Never let a problem to be solved, be more important, than a person to be loved. Friends move away, children grow up loved ones pass on, it is so easy, to take others for granted until that day when they’re gone from our lives, and we are left with feelings of, ‘what if’, ‘if only’, the bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone. Send that note to that friend you’ve been neglecting, give your child a hug, give your parents a hug. Say i love you more. Always express your thanks. Often we assume that they must know how much we love them, but we should never assume, we should let them know.”

“People will try to put the same limitations on you, that they put on themselves. Don’t mistake their insecurities for your limits.”
Mark Manson

“I used to use the old phrase, ‘i’ll take care of you, you take care of me.’ I found out how short ended that was. I changed it. Here it is ‘ill take care of me for you, if you take care of you for me’. The best contribution i can make for you as your friend, is to take care of my personal development. What if i become 10 times wiser, 10 times stronger, 10 times better. 10 times more unique. Think of what that will bring to our friendship. Self sacrifice usually earns contempt, self development and self investment earns respect.”

“The law of indirect effort is the one behind the following phenomena.
If you want impress someone – be impressed by them
if you want to interest someone – be interested in them
If you want be liked by someone – like them “

“People only saw decisions i made, not the choices i had”

“A place where someone still thinks of you, is a place you can call home”

“If you wanna me magnetic when you walk into a room, imagine that you walk into the room and take each four corners of the room and puts them into your pocket”

“Every high is a new low. The basis of all our problems in life is to get egotistically high on something but each high can lead to a new low. See if i make you happy right now then i have the power to make you unhappy. So the thing is, i have learned something in my life, which is very simple, if people tell you how wonderful you are, oh Mr. Masters you healed my cancer, you did this, i dont get pumped up by that. I say, thats nice. I step aside and let nature take the credit not me. My ego doesn’t gobble that up. But then where is the satisfaction then? Well the satisfaction is doing that. The satisfaction is in stepping aside. thats where the happiness is. Because thats when you get some kind of inner glow. I have learned a great ancient wisdom. If people tell you you’re wonderful. Dont get excited. If people tell you that you are a stupid idiot. Dont be vexed. If you learn to not get excited when people tell you how wonderful you are, and not angry when people let you down. You have found the secret of life. “

“Remember that no-one knows whats going on in your head, and they never will.”
– Bill Nighy

“Treat everybody with curtsy. Thats a sign of great professionalism. Anything other than that is unprofessional. “
– Bill Nighy

“I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone.”

“My whole life has been about people pretending to be something they’re not. And when you look at this world full of actors playing these games you don’t get angry, you don’t get upset, you dont say god i wish everything was different. I wish people would just be who they are. You just enjoy it. And its amusing.”

Quotes

“In the case of any action, if you wish to carry it out in flow and in a sustainable way. Imagine, that you will do it for a year without pause, or even for eternity. “If i were to talk to this person for eternity, how would i be talking to them?”. You would have no rush, you would make yourself comfortable. “

Quotes

“The only reason why your not living the life you want to live, is because you, day by day, keep feeding the life you dont wanna live”

“A cat that dreams of becoming a lion must loose its appetite for rats.”

“In the end, only three things really matter, how much you loved, how joyfully you lived, and how gracefully you let go of the things not ment for you. “
Buddhist saying

“Let go, or be dragged”
Buddhist saying

“One of the greatest indicators of a good life is how gracefully you let go of things not ment for you.”

“In order for something new to come, something old must go. And that old can sometimes mean: let go of what you know until now. Empty the cup. And start from the beginning. Its not easy to do but sometimes its the only what, that something thats blocked, can be brought back to movement. Spill the old tea, and pour a new one”

“It is impossible for a person to learn what they think they already know.”
– Epictetus

Quotes

“You get what you fight for, not what you wish for”

“Stop waiting to feel ready. Ready is not a feeling. It’s a decision.”

“My second grade teacher sayid “If something feels too hard to start, it just means that the first step isn’t small enough.” And so the way i play around with it now, even in my own writing is okay i have to write a new article, and i’m like “i can’t do that”, okay so i’m in a ‘I cant’-mode. Okay. If i’m in a ‘I cant’ mode and something feels too hard, i hear her voice “It just means that the first step isn’t small enough.” so ill make it smaller. Literally ill just make it smaller. Im gonna write a page today. And then often i’m like “i cant do that”. Okay. So it just means the first step isnt small enough. Ill write a paragraph then. And i’m like “I cant do that”. Okay. Smaller. ill write a word then. “

Quotes

“When your kingdom is invaded, don’t run, show them why it’s your kingdom”

“Your haters are out there holding their breath, waiting for you to fail, make sure they suffocate”

Quotes

“Once you understand the power of your words, you wont just say anything. Once you understand the power of your thoughts, you wont just think anything. Once you understand the power of your presence, you wont just be anywhere.”

“What you think about, you become.
Thoughts lead to actions, actions lead to behaviours, behaviours leads to lifestyles, lifestyle determines your destiny.
Everything begins in the mind.
You control your mind, you control your future.”

Quotes

“Both faith and fear demands you believe in something you cannot see”

“Weather you believe you can do it, or believe you cannot, you are right.”

Quotes

“Small things missing, overshadow big things done”

“Minimise the amount of features. Make every feature perfect”

Quotes

“Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone”
Alan Watts

“Before you help heal someone, figure out if they’re willing to give up the things that made them sick.”
Hippocrates

Quotes

“It has been observed that stupidity often emerges in group settings. Studying this it has becomes clear that stupidity is not a psychological problem, but a sociological one. Perfectly rational people will abandon their critical thinking abilities when they were in the presence of others.”
– Dietrich Bonhofer

“Solomon Ashes conformity experiments show that when people are around others, there is a tendency that they say what they think will make them seem likeable, over what is rational and right.”

Quotes

“Succesfull people say no to most things”

“I was talking to a guy who owned 14 really successful gyms. He called it open to goal. and he said “yeah yeah yeah” he said “my managers work open to goal”, and i was like “what does that mean?”. “Its like so they work open, until they hit their goal. And so sometimes that means that they hit their goal by noon and they can cut out. Or that means they have to go from 5 am until midnight that night cause thats how long it takes them to hit the goal.” And so i have seen this across a lot of high acheivers across domain. So like ill keep shooting free shots until i hit a hundred free shots. I will practice my presentation until i have done 2 without mess ups.”

Quotes

“Most people try to build confidence. But they are carrying shame from the past. To build an unshakable belief in yourself, you have to become delusionally self forgiving. Forgive yourself when you’re off or when something doesn’t go right. Forgive yourself when you freeze, forgive yourself when you are not the version that you wish you were in a situation. And most of all, view your past as a fun game. Nothing more. It was hilarious, and it was fun. That’s it . Self forgiveness is not weakness, it is access. Self forgiveness is how you keep your system clean enough to take bold action. Because no one can perform while secretly punishing themselves. Real confidence only lives within a body that feels safe with itself.”

“The number one mistake people make learning confidence or authority, Is to view it through this lens of, i walk in this room and i try to be really confident. My brain starts to view this as ‘am i more confident than the other people in the room, am i higher up in some hierarchy’. And the exact moment somebody starts thinking or worrying about hierarchy and status, you have lost it. Like its gone. And if you just think of it in terms of, can i be more comfortable than the people around me? And thats not only be contagious, its gonna help them to relax. Its gonna help you to relax. If you can get to a point where all you worried about is comfort. Can i move slower than the other person. Can i get into a place where im more comfortable than everyone else in the room.”

“One of the ways that i learned to help people who were socially anxious was to tell them to stop thinking about how comfortable they were in a new social situation. And do nothing but attend extremely diligently to trying to make the person they were talking with comfortable. ”
– Jordan Peterson

“The number one mistake that people make is thinking that confidence or authority has anything to do with anybody else. When somebody says i have authority, they’re thinking in terms of some social hierarchy, like i’m above this person. Hierarchy and status are not related in any way to authority and self-confidence.”

“When your soul and your self is congruent, i think the world can feel that stuff. The most magnetic person in the room is always the one with nothing to hide.”
– Chase Hughes

Quotes

“Start every conversation in the middle. In other words, skip the smalltalk skip the intro, just start talking to them about what you want to talk about. So if i have minimal context, because i’ve never seen them before. I just use the minimal context that i have. The way they look, the way they hold themselves, what they are wearing. I use my curiosity to find any interests and thats what i focus on. I dont make this difficult. I make it as easy as possible”

“Make eye contact at the end of their point. So you can be talking looking around. looking up, remembering something. But at the end of the point, thats when eye contact matters. A big mistake people make when it comes to rehearsing is that they get so rehearsed that they don’t break eye contact. And it gives you sort of a robotic feeling. So if you’re practicing a presentation. So when you’re practicing a presentation, practice not always looking at the person you’re talking to, but to look around as if you are looking for the right words to say. ”

“One thing i did when i was 23 was, if i got interested in the coal business. I would go out and see the CEO’s of eight or ten coal companies. And the interesting thing was i never made appointments usually i just dropped in. But they thought, a fella from Omaha, that look like me couldn’t be too harmful, so they’d always see me. And i would ask them a lot of questions. But i’d always ask them two question in the end, i would ask them ‘If they had to put all of their money into any coal company except than their own, and go away for 10 years and couldn’t change it, which one would it be and why’. And then after they had answered that, i would ask them ‘and as part of that deal, they had to sell short on their money within one coal company, which one would it be and why.’ And if i went around and talked to everybody in the coal business, about that, i would know more about the coal companies from an economic standpoint than anyone of those managers probably would. So i think there’s lots of ways to learn about business.”
Warren Buffett

I read this research by Dan McAdams, Three levels of intimacy. What he found is that we get stuck in these levels, first levels called general traits. Thats occupation, age, gender. We get stuck there. The second level is what he calls personal concerns. This is like motivations, values. This is what gets you up in the morning what drives you. The third level is called self narrative. This is what you tell yourself about yourself. Thats what helps you understand them deeply and predict their behavior. Thats my goal in alot of my interactions.

“The three most powerful questions to ask someone. ‘What is your favorite thing about yourself?’. Why is this important? This will allow you to understand, how this person values themselves. Its going to allow you to see the good in them so that you can remind them of this good. Why is that important? This is how you build intimacy and trust, and support them. Whenever you reiterate the good points, that they themselves already see. They will feel heard, understood and safe. Second question. ‘Who shaped your life in the most important way?’ When you know who is the most important figure in their life, and why, you can. understand the likes, the dislikes and triggers of this person. So you can be more sensitive to their needs. I asked a fiance onces who was about to get married. ‘Do you know the father of your bride well, and the impact he had on her life?’ This would be a good way to become a better husband. For example from knowing that she got hurt when her father left her early in her life. You will know that simply being late to a meeting or a date is going to be a big trigger for them. Third question is ‘How do you react when someone hurts you or disappoints you. This will teach you the triggers that this person is already sensitive to. You will learn the words that you find are normal to use but to them these words hurt them.’”

One thing you can do to keep someone from getting defensive is to talk about distances. I do this alot when i feel like there is something unspoken between the two of us. Instead of saying “Whats wrong with you” or “i feel like you’re not listening to me” or “i feel like you’re upset with me” because now i just took something, thew it at you and said do something with it. Im not trying to be helpful. But distances are a way of separating, when you say ‘I don’t feel very close to you right now.’ or ´i feel like we far apart´ or ´i feel like theres distance between us right now´. All of these are really good at describing the situation without putting blame on anyone.

“Do not speak unless your words are more beautiful than silence.”
– Imam Ali

“A straw man is when you take somebody’s argument and you make it so simplistic or exaggerated, that it makes for an easier target. For example if an atheist says that Christianity is just worshipping some bearded man in the sky That would be a straw man because barely any Christian would accept that representation of their religion.
but the opposite of a straw man is a steel man. And according to Daniel Dennett it is the key to a good philosofical discussion. In 2013, Dennet presented four rules for any good philosophical debate. The first, and most important, is that you should ‘attempt to re-express your target’s position so clearly, vividly, and fairly that your target says ‘thanks i wish i thought of putting it that way.” Second, you should list all of the ways you and your partner agree on things. Third, you should recognise the ways in which your partner has thought you something new. And fourth, only now can you rebut or criticise their position. Key to all of this is to treat your opponent and their position with respect. If you read Plato’s dialogues, you’ll note that Socrates always presents his opponents with a steel man argument. A huge part of the dialogue involves Socrates clarifying, laying out, and even strengthening the other persons position.”

In integration theres a few things we do to get a good read on weather we’re dealing with the right person. And the first thing is called a bait question. So lets say you’re OJ, and you’re OJ Simson and you did whatever last night. And you come into the interrogation room and i say “Hey OJ, i appreciate you comming in, we got officers out there canvasing the street and we got tons of people doing lots of research. And i like you a lot as a person and i just want to say that i want you to think carefully before you answer this. Is there any reason somebody would have said that they saw you at Nicoles last night? If you were there, you’re freaking out, and i didn’t say i have a video, i’m not lying and saying that we have a witness or any of this evidence. What i am saying is there any reason that this would have happened?”

“To be able to speak your mind, you have to strengthen the connection that exists between your mind and your mouth. One of the best exercises you can do, is to go to a random word generator. Get the random word and then you have to talk about that word for three minutes. There are four tips to this.
1) Say what you see, feel or think. What is the first that comes to mind?
2) Tell a personal story. Whats the first personal story that comes to mind?
3) Embrace pauses
4) Dont worry about quality. Just keep the stream of consciousness going. “

“In every conversation you should have an outcome, i want this person to feel great could be an acceptable outcome. Right of the bat, you want to get them to start making identity agreements. You get them to either verbally or in their own head say, i am the type of person who (fill in the blank). For example, if we start a conversation and i say “You know, jack, there’s so many podcasters out there who has this rigorous structure that they have to follow, and its kind of nauseating to be on a podcast, so i’m glad i’m in here with you today”. I didnt say anything about you, but i got you to mentally agree that you are not one type of person. That can start compounding really quick. So if i walked in here like that, i might be able to get you to not pull out your ipad, not do anything. I’ve just said theres so many people who do X behavior that im glad it’s you and me here today. Im getting you to agree, that you are not that type of person.”

“If something true happened in the past, i use past tense. What did you do in the night of the incident, Well i went to my girlfriends house, we watched a movie, we had a little snack ,we brushed our teeth, and we went to bed. All past. A liar is describing something that didn’t really happen. and they rehearsed parts of it, and so theyll mess up their tenses. What happened at the night of the incident? I went over to my girlfriends house, and we’re watching a movie, and we realise that we have to brush our teeth, so i brush my teeth. Like the tenses are not right. The rehearsing, like in their mind its present. They mess up tenses, they also mess up hand gestures. You see like leaks and mismatches in their gestures, or no hand gestures at all, like gripping their hands because they dont want to give themselves away.”

“Presence is about making others feel at ease. How do you do that? Well one way to make someone feel at ease is to tell them “I was just thinking about you”. You are doing two things. First you’re telling them that they are in your mind. And secondly you are telling them that they belong here.”

Quotes

“People say that they worry what other people think about them. But you are not worried about what other people think about you. You’re worried what you think about you, and then you use other people as the excuse. Even when people say ‘I’m scared of the unknown.’ no you’re not, what you’re scared of, is what your own brain, based on past hurt and fears, is predicting could happen in the unknown. Its not the unknown that you are afraid of. Its that one of those things which has previously left some trauma, will happen.”

“The less talent they have, the more pride, vanity and arrogance they have. All these fools, however, find other fools who applaud them.”
– Erasmus

Quotes

“I think most people misunderstand what vulnerability is because we think of vulnerability as i gotta cry on your shoulder, or tell you all about my mom, right? Thats not vulnerability. Vulnerability is a very specific thing that happens in our brain, when i say something to you that you could judge, it makes me feel vulnerable. And when instead of judging, you respond with acceptance or with a vulnerability of your own. Suddenly we feel closer to each other. Even though we might not agree with each other, we feel closer, because we have given the person the opportunity to judge, and they haven’t used that against us. “

Quotes

“Theres a thing called sleep restriction training. Its very effective but it is brutal. We’re gonna set the clock and you’re gonna wake up at 5:00. I don’t care what happens you’re waking up at 5:00 a.m. period. and we’re not even gonna get into bed, until 11:59 p.m. so you’re going to have five hours of sleep at most and you know what happens night one? You’ll lay there, and you don’t fall asleep. And you’re also staring at the clock knowing i have to get up at five. And you’re laying there worrying and thinking about how you’re not sleeping, and it is brutal. And you’re gonna have a couple of hours of sleep and you’re gonna wake up at five. And you’re gonna get up at five every single day period. You’re also going to not get into bed, no matter how tired you are, you’re not getting into bed until 11:59 p.m. You do that for a week, what will happen very quickly is that you’re body will start to realise a new pattern of, ”yo, the second she lets us lay down, you better fall asleep. And you better not mess around in those 5 hours because we’re not getting any naps we’re not getting anything else.’ You will start to fall asleep quickly, And you will jump right into deep sleep. And you will go through a pretty compressed, very proper sleep architecture. Every week then, you add back 10 to 15 minutes. “

Quotes

“Theres a thing called the Solomon paradox, which is that theres a human tendency to be better at offering wise advice to others, than it is to apply that same wisdom to our own situation or our own lives.They call it the Solomon Paradox because Solomon was this big wise guy, but his life was actually a bit of a mess. The way that i use this is that i imagine talking to my 85 wise self. And i ask him what he thinks i should do. And whats weird is that it takes you out of your current frame, and puts you in this other frame and you become more objective about your current situation. “

Questions

Are they working on anything exciting at the moment?

Do they have any personal passion projects?

Are they looking forward to any big projects comming up?

What is their favorite thing about themselves?

What do they remember from their 20’s birthday?

Who shaped their lives in the most important way?

Do they have someone in their family that they aim to resemble?

If they imagine that they have an interaction with a person. What behavior from this person would hurt them the most?

What do they dislike about themselves the most?

When was the last time in your life that you were a beginner at something?

What was the last thing they changed their mind about? Big thing where they go ´I used to think that, and now i think this.´

How old were you when your mother and father took took on the job of getting to know themselves, so as to not pass on their traumas to you?

If at some point in the future, you decided to write a book about something, what do you think it would be about?

What feeling have you noticed the most in yourself during the last month?

Lets say you have a day off, what would you want to do? Now imagine that that is already done. What would you want to do then? Imagine that that is done too. What would you like to do then? …

Whats the two things that you remember you have been thinking about the most this weak?

Quotes

“Hey Ronald. Its just beginning”

“Hey Ronald. Look at the sky”

“Hey Ronald, You look stunning”

“Hey Ronald, You got this”

“Hey Ronald. She will come back”

“Hey Ronald. Keep chasing that dream.”

“Hey Ronald. Stay true to yourself.”

“hey Ronald. Watch your back out there.”

“Hey Ronald. Not all keys fit the lock.”

“Hey Ronald. Some doors only open once.”

“”Hey Ronald. Fate is whispering your name. Promise me you’ll answer it”

“Hey Ronald. What you do now, will echo through eternity”

“Hey Ronald. You’ll find her.”

“Hey Ronald. When she’ll calls. Promise you answer her?”

“Hey Ronald. You’ll get through this.”

“Hey Ronald. Don’t give up”